Facing Entrepreneurial Fears, with Christy Wright – Episode 188 of The Action Catalyst Podcast

Author, speaker, business coach and podcast host Christy Wright defines “mom guilt”, explains what women in particular intuitively know about business, why more is caught than taught, why the antidote to fear is action, and why to always make the easiest win your first step.

About Christy:

Christy Wright is the #1 bestselling author of Business Boutique, Take Back Your Time, and Living True. She is a certified business coach, dynamic speaker, and personal development expert. Christy served for 12 years as a Ramsey Personality with Ramsey Solutions before taking a leap of faith to do something new. Christy has thousands of hours experience speaking professionally on some of the largest stages in the country and she now uses that experience to teach others how to make the impact they want to make. Whether she’s working with authors and entrepreneurs or speakers and preachers, Christy is masterful at teaching people how to craft messages that they are excited to share and confident to deliver. Christy has been featured on The Today Show and Fox News, and in Success, Entrepreneur, and Woman’s Day magazines. Christy lives in Nashville, Tennessee with her husband, Matt, and their three children Carter, Conley and Mary Grace.

Learn more at ChristyWright.com.

The Action Catalyst is presented by the Southwestern Family of Companies. With each episode, the podcast features some of the nation’s top thought leaders and experts, sharing meaningful tips and advice. Learn more at TheActionCatalyst.com, subscribe below or wherever you listen to podcasts, and be sure to leave a rating and review!

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(Transcribed using A.I. / May include errors):

Host
Facing your entrepreneurial fear, that’s what we’re talking about on the show today, we have Christy Wright on the show to talk about overcoming that fear of starting something new. And so we’re just excited to have her talk about starting a business or any endeavor. Christy, welcome to the show.

Christy Wright
Thank you so much for having me. I appreciate it.

Host
This book. So Business Boutique, it’s called. Why targeted at women directly?

Christy Wright
Yeah, that’s a great question. And it’s interesting, because I was raised by an entrepreneur. So my mom started a business when I was six months old to raise and support me. So I was literally raised in a business at times, like, I mean, we would go there at two and three in the morning, you know, for her to bake early. And so I have countless memories of this cake shop. And it really is kind of the backdrop to my childhood. And so I have memories of you know, her pulling me out of bed and go into the bakery to bake and I’d go to, she’d actually make me a bed on her big huge bags of powdered sugar and flour. And I’d go back to sleep. You know, when I was going to school, I’d go to school with a smell a flower in my hair. And I would always get money out of the cash drawer, which it’s no surprise that her bookkeeper hated me because guess never balance. But I was a typical child of an entrepreneur, I was always there. And that was really my first introduction to business. And from there, I pursued a degree in business in college, and then started my own side businesses. Throughout my career. I’ve always been kind of a, you know, a go getter, and a doer and a mover and a shaker. And so I would have my career working for nonprofit, but I had these side hustles these side gigs. And what I’ve noticed is now we really live in the side gig economy where there are over a million Americans working as freelancers or independent workers are. So many people have these little side jobs or hide side hustles. And so I noticed that there’s an opportunity to come alongside women specifically and help them with the business side of things. Because while pursuing what you love can be incredibly rewarding the business side of things overwhelms a lot of people, how do I market myself? Or how do I stand out in the competition? And how do I sell without feeling slimy? Or how do I manage my time when I’m a mom, and one of the things I’ve noticed is as women, we really approach business uniquely, because as you know, we’re wired differently as men and women, the book is a step by step plan to start run or grow your business. But in the book, I cover all the issues that women need to understand in order to grow a business. But like, for example, I never talked about customer service. Like there’s not a single chapter in the book on customer service. And here’s why women intuitively take care of people like you don’t have to tell a woman be kind super served go above and beyond she naturally is very relational. And she is great at empathizing. And so she’s fantastic at customer service, I don’t need to teach that however, because women are so relational things like selling or pricing yourself or talking about your product or setting boundaries or policies makes her feel uncomfortable. And so I spend a lot of time on how to sell.

Host
So let’s talk about the selling part, selling without feeling slimy. So why do you think they feel that way? And what are some of the things that you can do woman or or male who kind of has that resistance?

Christy Wright
Sure, well I think for me, it’s I have noticed that everyone probably has been burned by a pushy salesperson, someone that didn’t do it well. And so because they’ve had a bad interaction, whether that’s a used car salesman that totally tried to take advantage of them or been interrupted and kind of bullied by someone in sales, it frames their perception of sales. So this they have this idea that sales equals pushy, aggressive, having an agenda, taking advantage of someone taking their money. And they use all these words to describe it, when in fact, sales is really about serving. And so what I do is I spend a lot of time reframing this idea of sales for people because if you can redefine it for them and show them what sales truly is, then they can sell with confidence. So for example, sales is influence. So influence is simply you know, making an impression on someone leading someone to a great result. So if you’re married, then you influence someone to spend the rest of their life with you. That’s a big sale. You know, if you got your kids to eat dinner last night, the thing is, is we’re really in the business of influence. And one of the things I’ve noticed is that like, I’m in the business of sales. And so I stand on stage all time, all the time telling people how to reach their goals and how to build their business and how to have more life balance. And you know what no one ever says to me, that Christy Wright? She’s so pushy, telling me I should reach my goals. Why? Because I’m not selling, I’m just influencing and when you believe in your product, or your service or your business, you realize really is about serving and taking care of the marketplace. Because when you’re meeting people’s needs, and you’re solving their problems, the sale is natural. But we focus so often on the pushy side of things that we hold back and we don’t even ask for the sale. Many people don’t have sales simply because they aren’t asking.

Host
Right. One of the things that you talked about specifically in Business Boutique that sort of caught my attention, was this phrase mom guilt?

Christy Wright
I’ll tell you I had an experience, I guess it was about two years ago. So when my son Carter, I was dropping him off at daycare for the first time, which if you end up taking your kids to daycare, just know it is a traumatic day. And you are a basket case, and you’re leaving them in the arms and the care of someone else. And I was leaving daycare that day, just feeling so guilty that the daycare, by the way, is exactly like 1/10 of a mile from our office. So this child is right next to me. He’s perfectly safe. I was just overcome with guilt and feeling what if he needs me? What if he’s scared? What if he’s sad? What if he cries? What if, what if what if, and I felt really honestly, God’s say to me in that moment, Christy, I want you to remember that what you’re doing is important. And I felt God saying what I was driving to which I was driving to one. And what’s interesting is it shifted my perspective, because I think as parents and as business owners, it’s very easy to look in the rearview mirror of our life, instead of the front windshield. So we’re always focused on what we’re leaving behind. Oh, I feel, you know, when we’re at home, I feel guilty of not getting enough done at work. So we got our email open, and we’ve got our phones on, we’re always thinking about where we’re not. And then when we go to work, we feel guilty, we’re not with our kids, we’re not at home, we’re missing out on soccer games. So I just want you to shift your perspective, realize that both things that you’re doing your work and your family are very important, and you love them both very much. And that’s okay, that’s a good thing. But the best way to shake the guilt is to focus on wherever you are. So if you’re at work, be there busted, make a difference. But you’re at home, put your computer down, look your kids in the eye, put your phone away and be present there. So wherever you are, be there. And for me that has been a game changer because you are looking through the front windshield instead of the rearview mirror. And I love how my friend Tony says that he says I’m always driving to somewhere that I love. When I’m driving to work, I’m driving to somewhere that I love. And when I’m driving home, I’m driving somewhere that I love. And it’s it really is about looking where you’re going, not focusing on what you’re momentarily leaving behind.

Host
That’s strong. Do you think there’s value to kids seeing their mom work?

Christy Wright
Yeah I totally do. And here’s what’s interesting is, I think it really comes down to whether you’re working a full time professional job in an office like maybe some of your listeners are or you’re working part time, or you’re just using your gifts in some way at home, even if you’re volunteering, like if you’re doing something outside or in addition to of your responsibilities. As a mother, as a parent, as a dad, I think there is incredible value in your kids seeing you use your gifts. And for me, my mom, for example, growing up my mom did not teach me work ethic and character and perseverance and persistence and resilience. She lived it and I live it as well. More is caught than taught. And it’s so powerful when you live and your strengths. When you use your gifts when you do something that is contributing to the world, whether that’s through volunteering, or through your job or your business, it is an unbelievable example to your children that is more powerful than anything you could teach them. So my argument is for for women or for men, is you’re not harming your children by working hard. It doesn’t make you a bad parent. In fact, I think it makes you a better parent. And Meg Meeker has a fantastic quote, she says the most powerful way to teach a daughter how to enjoy life is to let her see her mother do the same. So what does that look like for you in terms of using your gifts and doing work or doing things that bring you joy. And like I said, I don’t think it makes you a bad parent, it makes you a better parent. It doesn’t make you selfish, it makes you smart. And you are going to raise children that have those qualities because you live them out as well. You know, my mom, her story of the cake shop was the story of struggle, I certainly didn’t have a Pinterest perfect childhood sleeping on flour and sugar bags. But that is the story that made me you know, it’s the struggle didn’t hurt me. And the struggle is what made me.

Host
When you actually go to start the new thing, what are the obstacles that we should expect to hit?

Christy Wright
Okay, I’ll tell you for me in my research, but also in my personal experiences, the number one thing that you will experience that will hold you back is fear. The number one thing now when you’re in the workplace, and maybe a different type of fear. And that voice of fear might be a little bit different. So for example, when you’re doing your own business, if you had a side business or small business that you want to start to voice might say something like, Who are you to do this, someone’s doing it better. There’s no room for you in the marketplace. Now when you’re in a work environment or professional environment and you want to launch a new project or you want to pitch an idea to your leadership team, then the voice might say something like everyone’s gonna make fun of you. What are people gonna think? Who do you think you are to try to lead this someone else is already in that position. That’s, that’s not in your job description. So the voice might say something different. I want to be clear there, depending on the situation that you’re in the root of the problem is the same. You’re going to experience fear and fear is very normal. Anytime that you’re doing something new, you’re going to have fear creep up of and it will torment you with these terrifying possibilities of what’s going to happen if you do it. You’re gonna fail. People make fun of you, if you’re gonna be embarrassed, you’re gonna post something on Facebook and no one’s gonna like it, you know, you’re gonna be a fool. And so when this fear gets really loud, that’s where most people get stuck because most people believe that fear is a sign you’re doing something bad. It means it’s a red flag. So you should turn back now if I was supposed to do this, it would be easy. I wouldn’t be scared. But I would say the opposite is true. Fear isn’t a sign you’re doing something bad. I think it’s a sign you doing. You’re doing something bold and I think that is a good thing. Hang, and even very, very successful people are scared. Many successful people that are well known celebrities and athletes have suffered from the imposter syndrome, which is the syndrome that says, Who are you to do this, you don’t deserve to be here, people like Maya Angelou, Kate Winslet, Michael Jordan, you know, talk about this fear of failure, this fear of not being good enough to do the thing that they’re doing. And so I just encourage people, the antidote to fear is action. The best thing you can do when you’re scared is to take action is to step into that fear. I tell people all the time, don’t wait until you’re not scared to do the thing you want to do. Do it scared? Because that feeling may never come? You know, I’ve been scared plenty of times. But I still walk on the stage, even though I’m scared. So what is that that you want to do? Is it a project you want to launch? Is it a new initiative at work that you want to lead? You want to raise your hands? I think it’s time for me to lead this thing. Is it starting, you know, growing a team from the ground up, maybe pitching a really big client at work? Maybe it’s starting a site or small business, whatever that thing is, don’t wait until you’re not scared to do it, do it scared.

Host
So when you come to actually starting a business, there’s all of these things that suck taxes, insurance, hiring people, firing people, all of this stuff. You know, if that’s holding someone back, what would you say?

Christy Wright
You know, it’s interesting, because I think the whole business side of things really intimidates a lot people, a lot of people and keeps them from starting businesses, you feel like before you’ve started a business, that that stuff, the insurance, the taxes represents probably 90% of running a business. But the reality is, it represents about 10%. Now, granted, it’s a very important 10%. But the majority of your time, the 90%, day to day, it’s doing interviews, writing blogs, serving customers, making sales, it’s doing the fun stuff, which is why you got into business. Now, certainly, you need to take care of the business side of things, you need to keep your records, you need to have insurance, you need to pay your taxes, those things are very, very important. But what I would say for people that are intimidated by that is if you can just get help in those areas, you’re not expected to be an expert and everything. But there are probably people around you on social media, in your church, in your community in your neighborhood, that if you just simply put a word out, like, hey, you know, do you know anybody that can help me with this. And that’s true for anything that you’re weak. You know, I tell people again, and again, in business, but also in leadership, for your listeners that are working in a company in a career, you are going to be the most successful in life. Regardless of what type of work you do, you will be the most successful when you stay on your strengths. And so how that plays out is you’re going to be the most successful, but you’re also going to have the most fun when you do what you’re good at. So for all of the areas that you’re weak, especially in business, just ask for help find people around you that can support you, you know, my husband is incredible with details. So he helps me with the organization of things and the follow through and covering all the bases things I wouldn’t even think about because I’m a creative, I’m a big idea person. So surround yourself with people that are strong in areas that you’re weak, and then you can stay in your strengths. And those people get to stay in their strengths as well. Interesting. Because if you’re can get so loud and terrify you at these possibilities of what will happen and then you stay stuck and you never do anything, then you continue to believe that story that you’re telling yourself like, Oh, I couldn’t do because it was so big. It turns into this excuse that you justify being stuck. But the truth is, and that’s the reason I say the antidote to fear is action. Because the best way to make that fear Shut up is to do it then fear can’t torment you with these terrifying possibilities what will happen if you do it because you did it and you survived and it’s the best way to make fear, Stop taunting you is when you actually just step into it and do the thing anyway.

Host
So if somebody is out there right now, and they are listening, and maybe they have some dream, and they have that fear, what is the first action that you would tell them to take?

Christy Wright
I would say find out what the quickest win is for you and your business and your idea so the lowest hanging fruit so for example if you want to have a huge online community you’ve got this big dream and you want to have a big blog and all that stuff don’t get overwhelmed by this big big idea. Write one blog let’s say you want to launch a huge boutique storefront don’t get overwhelmed by all of that just sell one product make one sale write one blog do one speaking event what is the thing for you that’s the lowest hanging fruit because if you take that one step I mean just one step that’s all you have to do one baby step that when will feel your competence to take the second step which will feel your competence to take the third step and then baby step after a time months and years later you’re living your dream and you’re at that final vision but the truth is it just happened by taking that first step so whatever that is for you figure that out your quickest when your lowest hanging fruit take that step that will fuel your confidence to keep going.

Host
Well my friend, so good to spend some time with you, Christy Wright is who we’re listening to, Business Boutique is the name of the book. Christy. Thanks for all the work that you do there and that all y’all do as a team.

Christy Wright
Thank you for having me.